Life is full of regrets or not. :')

There are so many things that I had done that makes me feel so sorry to myself. Usually the stupid things or that tiny little steps that I wasn't brave enough to take. Odd enough, I don't really regret much except for the things I didn't do which is clearly one of the mottos I live by..

I'd rather regret the things I have done than the things that I haven't.

My past molds the present me. I wouldn't learn to be smart if I didn't do all the stupid things in my life. I wouldn't be acting the way I am now if I didn't do the things that I had done. Well.. you could say that I like to learn or will only learn through the hard way and sometimes, I don't learn at all.

Not going to bore you with all my stories but I've been betrayed, back-stabbed and used by the people I loved. Yes, loved. I'm not the kind of person who would still be nice to you when you treated me like a trash. I DID treat you wholeheartedly, I trusted you and had faith in you and in the end, what do I get? A heartbreak.

After all these bullshits, I don't think it would ever be possible for me to trust you again. Let's just face it, it will never be the same and I will not bother myself to even try. Why? Simple, you're not worthy anymore. You don't worth my time, my effort, my sincerity, loyalty etc.

Even though I stop loving those assholes and bitches, I still want to be nice to everyone. With all the unwanted dramas/tragedies keep pestering them, some people actually stopped hoping and expecting because getting hurt again and again is just plain tiring. They stopped believing in their own race cause having hope, faith and love is just way too luxurious for them! DON'T! Don't ever lose that 3 core values, they're the pillars that hold us up and make us strong. Don't give up on the majority just because of the ungrateful minority.

Call me stupid or whatever you want, I still strongly believe that there are people that would actually love and appreciate me just the way I am and be grateful for the things that I do for them. Bless those people. They deserve my heart. ♥

Can you or can you not? ♥

Why must we try so hard to define something we couldn't? I don't know about you but I can't define a relationship, to be exact, my relationship. I mean, how can you define how serious it is? There's no quantitative scale that you can use to measure how serious are you or how much effort you're willing to put in. For me, I just follow what my heart tells me or how I feel now.

Yes, I do have expectations in a relationship. I'm sorry that I have, but feeling like your partner is the one or hoping for the best are what girls tend to do and I do aware that realistically, fairy-tale doesn't exist. Not saying that it's not possible, but for most of us, we're just not the lucky Cinderella who found her prince charming right away and instantly fall for each other then live happily ever after.

Having expectations means that I've actually thought about the future but don't want to over think it cause life is full of uncertainties and decisions. I won't know and can't control what will happen next, cause I already have more than enough to take care of now. I get it when you have a general idea about your future, but you see, life will always mind-fuck you and things won't always go according to plan, that's why we have 25 more alphabets to go with if Plan A didn't work out.

So why can't you just stop worrying for the uncertainties and start holding on to what you can have now but not in the future. You'll never know if you'll get another chance if you let this one slides right under your nose. Appreciate and cherish it people. :'(

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